Dear Future Children

I am so excited for you to meet this man

I wonder if you have some idea of  how much he loves you already. He has waited a long time for you to enter his life, and he will do everything in his power to bring you happiness. Can I tell you a little about him? It would be my pleasure.

Your dad loves water. He grew up in Hawaii and feels more at home outside than inside at times.

He's kind of a daredevil, which I think you will like very much. I will like it most times. :-) And yet I anticipate those moments in our future where I play the mom role, and everyone rolls their eyes saying "Oh mom, you always worry too much. We're fine!" And we will be.

Your father loves me very much. He is dedicated to telling me that every single day. :-)

Your father is a warrior in the battle of good and evil. His testimony of Jesus Christ is solid, and he honors his priesthood every day. He is the presider of our home; his mere presence will bring you feelings of safety and comfort. I always think of him when I read Alma 56, because I do not doubt his mother taught him exceptionally well. Thank you, Laura and Dan.

 

Your dad loves to play, which is one of the many reasons we get along so well. ;-) He is up for anything. 5:00 am movie and pancakes? "Sure babe." Come to the gym with me? "Let's do it right after I get off work." Burger King for dinner tonight? "I love whoppers."

Build a fort??!! "Great idea Rach! Man your battle station, Viper!"

My primary role is to be your nurturer, but your daddy is a nurturer too. You are so lucky for that. I suffered from severe cluster headaches last winter, and he sat with me until the end of every one. Those nasty little things screamed at me almost every day in February. One lasted for almost half a day, and your dad held me until it was over. Another came along to ruin our Valentine's Day. The headache began at somewhere around 4:30 am, and Jon was at my doorstep in minutes to guide me through it for the next four hours. He is a rock, and I know his example of love and loyalty will inspire each of you to be better children of God.

Your daddy is fun! He makes me laugh.

I wonder if you will be shy like he was as a kid. My little treasure box children,  just needing to be opened in the right places for your jewels to shine.

We plan to go on family hikes as often as we can. Are you ready for Ditto adventures?

It seems your daddy was born to be a father. Children are drawn to him, and being around them brings him great joy.

But I know you will bring him the greatest joy of all. I can't wait to see him in each of you.

Control

From Jem:

Truth, we don't wanna hear

It's too much to take

Don't like to feel out of control

So we make our plans

Ten times a day

And when they don't go

Our way we

Breakdown

Yeah we breakdown

Well don't you breakdown

Listen to me

Because

It's just a ride, it's just a ride

No need to run, no need to hide

It'll take you round and round

Sometimes you're up

Sometimes you're down

It's just a ride, it's just a ride

Don't be scared

Don't hide your eyes

It may feel so real inside

But don't forget it's just a ride

Slowly, oh so very slowly

Accept that

There's no getting off

So live it, just gotta go with it

Cuz this ride's, never gonna stop

Breakdown

Don't you breakdown

No need to breakdown

No need at all

Because

It's just a ride, it's just a ride

No need to run, no need to hide

It'll take you all around

Sometimes you're up

Sometimes you're down

It's just a ride, it's just a ride

Don't be scared now

Dry your eyes

It may feel so real inside

But don't forget enjoy the ride.

No point in trying to control what you cannot control. That only wastes your energy and your time. If something is worrying you, realistically determine whether or not you have some level of control over the situation. If you do have some portion of control, rate it on a scale from 1 to 10 in its rank of importance. From a higher and more eternal perspective, we learn that some trivial matters are taking way more out of us than they really should. So review in your mind the things that are causing you stress, and see if you can throw away or at least spend less time on those that are least important.

Control what is in your power to control, but relax and let go of the things that you cannot. Meanwhile, tell someone how much you love him/her today. That is definitely in your power. :-)

Thanks for soothing me, Jonathan 

Standstill Moments

That is what Erin Maxwell Sorensen and I began calling them. I think the phrase came to my mind while exploring the wonders of China during May 2009. It was during a bikeride in the enchanting city of Beijing. The smiling eyes of the Chinese welcoming us as we passed them by, the grace in the movement of tai chi through the trees in every park, and the fact that I was far far away, liberating my soul. Suddenly the world seemed to stop moving in a moment of pure joy and ecstasy. Or at least, it stopped the sadness, the anxiety, the struggles of  life for a few minutes. Happiness froze in its place, so that I could immerse myself entirely into it. And I nearly tasted it. In those magical moments, I pleasantly strolled along and everything felt at peace in this world. It was pure bliss, contentment, and peace of mind.

And so, Erin and I continued to call those moments "standstills." And she is just as likely as I am to continue searching for those, even if we must be the creators. True, I can't go on an enchanting bikeride in Beijing every day. But I can create happiness whenever I choose. And absolutely, I choose to find the  standstill moments. They may vary in their intensity or in their length of time, but here are some of those that Jonathan and I have shared in our life together thus far.

Hiking the Y for a sunset picnic

Playing with the Dittos. Seriously people, I lucked out with the in-law situation.

Watching Jon play with babies. Any baby. I think he likes them more than I do!

Playing in a river in Puerto Vallarta

And our first few nights in our new home. Who needs a bed anyway?

Or a kitchen table for that matter?

"We should honor the Savior's declaration to 'be of good cheer.'  Indeed, it seems to me we may be more guilty of breaking that commandment than almost any other!" -Jeffrey R. Holland

I dare you to create a standstill moment today.

Awake

3:30 in the morning is a strange time to be awake. I suppose that is why my body is not too happy about it. But I felt ancy and my being uncomfortable was keeping my sweet husband awake.

Husband. I have one of those now. I have an exceptional one, in fact. He is so good to me. I often feel like I could be better for him. We were sealed by President Pinegar in the beautiful Manti temple on Tuesday, June 1, 2010. Our sealing ceremony was heavenly. How else can I describe such a moment of eternity? One of those sacred moments where heaven and earth meet together, and we in the midst of them. Manti was a little less convenient in distance, but so worth it for the experience. Manti is now a part of our fairy tale. And the covenants we made with each other there are at the heart of it.

Which is why we went back on June 26th for the pageant. Our first tradition in our little Ditto family. :-) And finally we got to spend some time with Aunty Yasmin without feeling rushed. What an inspired woman she is. At the end of the pageant, I couldn't help but think about Yasmin losing her husband just two years ago. No trial could be greater than losing a spouse, I think. Thank heaven for the power of the Priesthood that seals families together in this life and the next.