Awake

3:30 in the morning is a strange time to be awake. I suppose that is why my body is not too happy about it. But I felt ancy and my being uncomfortable was keeping my sweet husband awake.

Husband. I have one of those now. I have an exceptional one, in fact. He is so good to me. I often feel like I could be better for him. We were sealed by President Pinegar in the beautiful Manti temple on Tuesday, June 1, 2010. Our sealing ceremony was heavenly. How else can I describe such a moment of eternity? One of those sacred moments where heaven and earth meet together, and we in the midst of them. Manti was a little less convenient in distance, but so worth it for the experience. Manti is now a part of our fairy tale. And the covenants we made with each other there are at the heart of it.

Which is why we went back on June 26th for the pageant. Our first tradition in our little Ditto family. :-) And finally we got to spend some time with Aunty Yasmin without feeling rushed. What an inspired woman she is. At the end of the pageant, I couldn't help but think about Yasmin losing her husband just two years ago. No trial could be greater than losing a spouse, I think. Thank heaven for the power of the Priesthood that seals families together in this life and the next.

Daydream

I sat and thought today

entering into one of those realms that are well,

difficult to put into words.

Far away from here, from where I usually am



And I fear that I have wasted precious brain power

on things of far less importance for a majority of my days.

Where have I been for so long?

I want to offer so much to the world

much

much

much

more



And yet at only 24 I feel tired.

Tired - why? I ask myself

Expectations.

I am the major culprit for placing those heavy things on my shoulders

and yet society plays its toll as well

if I let it

Any other reasons? Maybe. Maybe I have learned how to work hard and this is a valid excuse for taking the time to breathe. Maybe I am recovering from five years of a stressful yet very content lifestyle, and that is why I am tired.

Maybe.



But still thinking,



thinking,



thinking



and lost in my own thoughts.

It feels good, even cleansing in a way to open up those areas that have rarely been opened



I know I have been taken to that place before, I just can't remember when.

Probably because I let so many unnecessary things get in the way



But I really should go there more often.



And I want to learn and think more about things that matter.

LiFe's LittLe PleAsuRes

They ought to be mentioned. Here are a few of mine:

Homemade granola
Soothing soundtrack music: Try Pride and Prejudice or Gladiator
Laughing till you cry
My bed time routine: Warm rice bag at my feet, face washed, contacts gone, hands lotioned, prayers said, and dreams of jonathan awaiting
Gingersnaps and cinnamon bears

And creating a personal blog where I can express myself. It is rejuvenating, and I have been away for some time. And whether or not someone is following along, I will continue to write.

Because I would that my soul is liberated. :-)